My Happiness Report is a weekly collection of things making me happy, for the week ending October 21st, 2018.
Dear friend,
I’ve been a bit glum lately about my kids growing up. We’ve had the worst time this season trying to find a day the kids and I can all go to the pumpkin patch. It’s a seasonal tradition we’ve had since Jacob was born, and it makes me sad that their schedules are getting to be too full to find time for this.
I feel like we never see Jacob anymore. Between his job, basketball, school, his girlfriend and friends, he’s just a quick flash of hellos and goodbyes, usually as he’s grabbing something out of the fridge or pantry to eat. Maybe this is typical for 16 year olds but I don’t like it. I miss having all my family together and at least seeing them more than we get to anymore. Parents who have raised teenagers, do I have unrealistic expectations that family time might be included in the busy schedule of a Junior in high school? Or is this typical? Family mealtime hardly ever happens where most of us are at the same place at the same time long enough to eat dinner together. Nick’s travel schedule has been insane, so most nights it’s just the girls and I, which I do enjoy, but I miss us ALL being together.
We only have 2 more years of him being in the house with us, but sometimes I feel like he’s already gone. Maybe that’s God’s way of preparing us to let go a little easier. Who knows, but it’s not something I’m liking at all.
It doesn’t help that I’ve been finding old pictures here and there. The flashback above is from 2010, but I swear it was yesterday. Time needs to slow down!
OK, so much for a “Happiness Report”. Good grief, I’m a bundle of Debbie Downer today. Sorry about that! Let’s move on to things making me happy lately, which I promise there are plenty!
Just writing this blog post made me incredibly happy. Take me back, please.
This (highly anticipated by me) book is released tomorrow and I can’t wait for it to arrive at my house. If you’re excited about it too, check out this sneak peak blog post by Tiny Ray of Sunshine.
I’ve been using this same day delivery service for 2 months now and it has seriously been one of the BEST things in my life. (Is that sad? It’s true!)
This was written over a decade ago, so I have no idea why I just now found it, but it’s a poignant read. (Speaking of kids growing up…)
This sweet kid deserves to be brother of the year. So heartwarming!
Oh my gosh…these ladies have me cracking up. #RetirementHomeGoals
Procrastinators unite! This strategy may help you to stop putting things off until the last minute (read it today, not tomorrow, ok?)
Wow – talk about turning something negative into an absolute positive! What a wonderful gesture.
This artist has been inspiring me lately. Look how talented she is! I just noticed she’ll be teaching a Skillshare class. Looks like I need to get a Skillshare account, stat.
My neighbor brings this dessert to our Halloween Party every year. I’m so looking forward to eating it again!
OK friends, that’s it for my Happiness Report this week! If you know someone you think would enjoy receiving a note of happiness in their inbox once a week, it’d make me so happy if you’d send them to this link to sign up. If you’d each share it with just one friend, you’d be passing on some positivity which the world needs. I love expanding my community of happiness lovers!
When you get a chance, write me back and let me know what’s making you happy lately (or just touch base and say hi!). I always love hearing from you 🙂
Have a great rest of your week and thanks for stopping by.
I think it’s always hard when our kids grow up – realizing that we are no longer the center of their universe! While it’s tough, and we miss the years when they were young, it’s also something to celebrate! Remind yourself that you have raised an amazing person – who is confident enough to go out and do things – to try and risk failure. That is no small accomplishment as a parent, so YAY YOU! Yes, our relationship with our kids change and what we want, and what they want, may not always coincide – and that’s ok. My boys are 23 and 25 and I only see them about 6 times a year and that has been hard – but it’s as it should be and… they still love to come home and we’re the first ones they reach out to with their wins as well as their losses – and that is truly priceless.
Well your comment just made me flat out cry. Thank you for the perspective shift. You are so right. Someone else responded to my email saying that I should be glad he’s happy – which he absolutely is. He enjoys school, has a good job, great friends, etc. I could have it so much worse. I think I just really miss him and how things used to be, but you are so right…there is a time for change and more changes to come. I guess I’d better hold on and get ready!
Thank you, friend, for sharing.
Just reading this brought tears to my eyes. I too am in the beginning stages of this. Aidan is 15 and some of his friends are 16 and driving. I see him so rarely and it makes me so sad 🙁 It’s like they only need us for money and food .
Right? It’s so hard, Leslie! Once they can drive (or have friends who do) the amount that they need you is cut down tremendously. At least our cats won’t ever leave us for better things. 😉
Aw thanks for the shout out! Man, it’s so hard as they get older. We know they’re getting so close to leaving the nest and we just want to hold on tighter. Junior year with my kids I always feel the panic and sadness rush over me. “Have I taught them everything they need to know to make it in this world? No. Gah.” Seriously though, hang in there 🙂 You’re raising wonderful humans, just embrace the moments together 🙂
I’m glad to know that Junior year angst is not abnormal. I feel it so hard…he still probably can’t even make boxed mac and cheese on his own. I have a LOT of work to do!
But seriously, thank you – I know you’ve been through all of this multiple times (and even sending one WAY away), so it’s always nice to hear the perspective of someone who has been there. I appreciate it, friend! Thanks for the words of wisdom.
If your child has friends, a job, he’s active, and has girlfriends! Be proud. It’ healthy and how it should be.
No sixteen year old wants to hang with the family or siblings. It’s just how life is.
You would be more upset if your child sat around all the time being a mama’s boy with no friends.
Once they learn to drive they pretty much disappear. 🙂
The whole point of having kids it to raise them to be functioning adults. Sounds like that is what is going on.
We see Jason’s kids physically only a few times a year. Does he wish it was more? Absolutely. But they are almost 21, they don’t want to hang with parents. I certainly didn’t at age 20. Or 16.
In fact, it really wasn’t until my late 20’s that I wanted to hang at all with my parents.
I think it’s extra hard for parents of this generation of kids because we made them the center of everything. I think my parents had a much easier transition than today’s parents because they never made us the center of their lives. They were the center of their lives. Then us. And honestly, I think that is how it should be.
My suggestion…get more dogs. 🙂 They love you and always want to spend time with you. And never ask for money. 😀
You make perfect sense – and I agree. I’m so happy he’s happy. I just wish we could have some of the same traditions as we used to. My girls miss having him around too and it’s just not the same doing things like that without him.
Hahaha – dogs do not ask for money, that is true, but they might be more expensive than my kids 😉 hehe
Grab up that family time when you can…be greedy! 😉 Invite his friends/girlfriend to YOUR house for dinner/to hang out. I disagree with the comment above that teenagers don’t want to be with their families. I think if that’s what we put out there, that’s what we’ll get. Certainly, they’re more independent and have more activities and freedom, but they need some “home time,” too. ♥ I made a point to volunteer at his high school a lot…I loved the school and bonus…I got to see a lot of Jack and his friends. I know it’s harder with a long sports season, though.
Don’t give up! Enjoy it all!!!
Hi Kristen. I’ve been with the same struggle 2 years ago when my only kid went to college. It’s really hard at first but I guess that’s all we are destined for. But I am always here for my son whenever he needs me though he often forgets me. Life’s hard that’s why it’s always good to have friends you can connect. Good that you have this blog, you can vent out.
This looks like so much fun! I had a party for my kids as well, but it wasn’t as cool!