Would you believe that I have been a mom for 7 years and until recently I have never read a parenting book. The last book I picked up that had anything to do with parenting was What to Expect When Your Expecting. Trust me… it is not that I think I have all the answers. I know I don’t. I know I am not a perfect parent and that reading up on some parenting books would probably do me some good. My problem is, I know so many people who read parenting books and then that book becomes bible to them. “This author says you should let infants cry it out… don’t feed that baby until four hours have passed or you will spoil him.” “If you don’t give your child choices, they will have poor self esteem. You should really practice Love & Logic with him.”
I guess I would say I parent mostly based on my instincts. I rely a lot on advice from other moms, blogs and my own family. I know a lot of people who do read the parenting books and they waste no time at all in passing on the information to me 🙂 One of the biggest reasons I have avoided parenting books is because I always had the feeling that I would question my own parenting instincts after reading one. I did not want to feel extra guilty about the job I was doing as a parent simply because someone else did not agree with how I did something.
Recently, Naomi of Rock-n-Tot, Tracing Handprints and Being Savvy Cleveland stopped by my blog and commented on my post about Jacob, Parenting With a Heavy Heart. That day, I took a look at her blog and was intrigued by a parenting book she had reviewed on her site titled “Even June Cleaver Would Forget the Juice Box.” You may remember back to the beginning of the school year when I realized the day of that I forgot my daughters 1st day of preschool. How about when we had the lovely situation where Kelly completely undid her car seat while driving down the interstate and my day ended in being puked on. Another gem.. the day I locked both girls in the car at the grocery store parking lot? Those were all days where I lost the Mother of the Year award (and the reason I started investing in a therapy fund for them for their adult years). Those parenting moments where you feel so guilty and so inept to be a parent and just know in your heart of hearts that you are the only mom in the world who would have this experience with their kids.
Parenting these days seems to be done in extreme measures. If your child hasn’t already had 3 years of soccer under their belt by the time they are 7, good luck finding a team that will take them. Mom’s are shuttling kids each and every day after school to this extra curricular activity or that. Birthday parties… oh don’t get me started on the birthday parties. Gone are the days of a simple cake and ice cream party, here are the days of traveling petting zoos, tot makeovers and live bands. It has all gotten to be a bit rediculous to see the pressure moms have on them to keep up with each other and to be “perfect”.
Enter Even June Cleaver Would Forget the Juice Box by Ann Dunnewold, Ph.D. This book needs to be in the hands of every mother on planet earth. Give it away at baby showers. Have a neighborhood book club featuring this book. Do something, please, so that mom’s all over the world can realize that there is no need to be a perfect parent. From the back cover, “Follow your gut, not your guilt. Connect with instead of compete with other mothers. Curb your need to overprotect, overperfect, or overproduce.”
Parenting books aren’t my thing, but if they were all as real as this one, I think I’d be singing a different tune. Namoi graciously sent me an extra copy to give to one of my readers. If you don’t win a copy, be certain to pick up a copy at your local library or head to your neighborhood bookstore and pick one up. It is an attitude shifting book that every mom needs to read! To win, please leave a comment on this post telling me what the best piece of parenting/marriage/life advice was you have ever received. All comments must have a valid email address. Deadline to enter is Tuesday, December 9th midnight CST.
And, since this is a cooking blog, I am adding a “recipe” if you can call it that for one of my kids favorite and simple treats. If I don’t have enough left over pie crust when making a pie to make them these cookies, I’m in big trouble with them!
Pie Crust Cookies
Use this pie crust recipe or your favorite pie crust recipe… it works either way!
2 cups all-purpose flour
3 tablespoons sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup cold vegetable shortening
1/4 cup (1/2 stick) cold unsalted butter, cut into bits
1 teaspoon lemon juice or cider vinegar
5 to 6 tablespoons ice water
3 tablespoons sugar mixed with 2 teaspoons cinnamon
Place flour, sugar, and salt in a mixing bowl or a food processor bowl. Mix thoroughly. Cut in shortening and butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Add lemon juice or vinegar and enough ice water to make a dough that just clings together. Cover dough with plastic wrap or foil and refrigerate for 30 minutes.
Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
Roll dough our on a lightly floured board or pastry cloth to 1/8-inch thick. Cut into desired shapes. Transfer to ungreased cookie sheets. Sprinkle with cinnamon sugar.
Bake in the center of the oven for 9-11 minutes, until golden. Remove to wire racks to cool.
Updated 12/10/2008 – And the winner is…. Stephanie from Fun Foods on a Budget. Congratulations, Stephanie!
my mom gave the best advice when she said, “don’t worry about how your house looks….there’ll always be dishes in your sink, but your kids will only be little once.” It’s hard sometimes with my perfectionist tendencies to remember it’s okay to let some parts of the housework slide on occassion and to stay focused on what’s TRULY important to me and what’s going to matter most when I am no longer on this earth.
candy tais last blog post..Hello December.
My sister (who is actually younger than me) told me to ‘pick my battles’. That means letting go the fact that my husband put a tacky ceramic toothbrush holder in our master bath, because when he suggests a medicine cabinet instead of a nice mirror in the half bath I can say “NO” without looking like I try to control everything.
The best advice I’ve received for parenting was that my husband and I had to be “in tune” and act as one, and not the “bad cop-good cop” routine. Even when one disagrees with the other. the children should not see us discussing the matter. Decisions should be made behind closed doors.
The best life/marriage advice certainly came from my mother. She said whenever I felt upset or angry, I should look at the issue closely and change the way I feel and the way I am. Because the only person we have control over in life is ourselves. We cannot change other people and should not spend our time trying to. Others will change whenever they want to change and not when you want. Our efforts would be better invested if we spent our energy working on being better ourselves.
The best piece of advice I have to give is to love. Love your life, your husband, your children, just learn to love what you have and you will always be happy. It isn’t always easy, but it will always work.
I know my wife visits your blog (and I visit infrequently), but more than that, we enjoy you food pics on Flickr. I remember popping over for the “missed the first day of preschool” post. Not trying to win the book, but I enjoy your writing and just thought I should “de-lurk” while I was here.
Best advice — which always works — is to go with your gut. Other advice from my mom: Bring an umbrella (if I don’t, it’s sure to rain).
We’re foster parents and haven’t read many (any) parenting books either. This is partly because we became parents (of an 8-year old) rather suddenly and because he’s not actually ours and so much of the advice doesn’t quite click with our experience. I did take a parenting class though and learned some valuable tools. One that we are still working on, “Address the behavior and ask God to change the heart.”
Jimis last blog post..Mexican Chicken Soup
Always go with what your heart tells you..
The best piece of advice I received before getting married was actually from a coworker, and it was something she had been advised by her mom:
“If you don’t want to be doing something forever, don’t start doing it just because you are getting married. In other words, if cleaning toilets isn’t your thing, don’t feel like it is your job to do so just because you are married. Every task can be shared.”
Michas last blog post..Crows Mill Sandwich Bread
It’s amazing what parents have to go through these days! Just like you mentioned, even birthday parties are out of control! I admire all of you and wonder how I’ll ever learn 🙂
The best piece of advice I’ve gotten for marriage and/or children and friendships is “never go to bed angry”
sharons last blog post..Sweet Potato Buttermilk Dinner Rolls
the future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams…..eleanor roosevelt
Hey there!
I think the best advice I have heard is something I heard just a week or so ago… Give yourself ALOT of grace… give your children more grace.. Know that God has equipped you to parent your children..not anybody else… but YOU!
Hugs.. Amy
Wow! This is my first visit to your website (I was directed here by Naomi). What an amazing writing talent you have. While I was reading just now I felt as though I could hear your voice in my head (and I have no idea what your voice even sounds like) and it was as if you were talking right to me!
That said, like many, I have been offered a great deal of advice about a great number of issues. However, I have managed to determine on my own that what works for other families may not work for mine…and vice versa. I have learned to listen to others opinions, consider them, take from them what I want and leave the rest behind without any guilt.
In addition to that, whatever it is my husband and I decide to do in any given situation, we have come to see that consistency IS the key! If our children know what to expect from us, and that we will not waiver from our choices, they are happier for it and they don’t even know why.
Thanks for sharing a slice of your life with me and for allowing me to do the same!
I would love a copy of the book, but indeed I will add it to my wish list should I not win one. Thank you!
I just recently had my second child. Our first was 7. I read somewhere to err on the side of the older child with your attention, the little one will not know the difference.
I know that is sound harsh, but giving the older child a little extra attention solves a lot of problems before they appear.
Also, the 7:00 pm bettime book. The 7:00 pm betime ritual has given me back my sanity.
Thanks for the reading suggestion.
I’ve done that with pie crust scraps after making a pie, but never cutting it into the cute shapes! How fun!
The best piece of advice I’ve received is pretty much the basis of that book – it’s okay to not be “perfect.” I very often have to remind myself of that over and over again…because I am definitely not perfect!
Stephanies last blog post..Inaugural Baking – Snack Cake
And just imagine, you have been positively influencing your beautiful children for seven years…preparing them for the world and sharing your words of wisdom. There is nothing more amazing and awe inspiring then the bond that a mother has with her children and the memories that they will cherish.
You have a wonderful family…enjoy every moment.
I was drawn to your blog from the post on tastespotting…Pie Crust Cookies. I never liked pie as a kid so my grandma would always make me my very own “cinnamon pie” at the holidays. I thought I was pretty special being the only one of 8 grandchildren to have their very own pie. It’s the same concept as your cookies except she used the entire crust and shaped it to the pie pan. I LOVED that pie. My grandma passed away 13 years ago and I still miss her everyday. I’m 37 and although pecan pie is now my favorite I still make a “cinnamon pie” every year in her honor.
Your picture and recipe stirred up many wonderful childhood memories. Thank you!
I saw this through Tastespotting and had to come see. I grew up eating Pie Crust cookies every Thanksgiving with my mom’s extra pie crust. I think it is something you have to grow up with, because I made them this year at my husband’s house at Thanksgiving, and they weren’t impressed. But they are delicious (even if you cheat and use the refrigerated roll out pie crust like we do).
What a great idea. We don’t have kids yet, we’ve been married almost a year in half and plan on at least another year before we start planning. I love reading informational books though, I always try to “take the meat and spit out the bones”. But the best advice I have applies to parenting, marriage and life: “Always be willing to say I’m sorry”. There are several times where I felt I was right, but knew I hurt someone and said I’m sorry. Then it led to a good conversation to figure where the misunderstanding happened.
Dianas last blog post..Judge our Gingerbread House Competition!!!
These cookies are a great idea. You can make the pie crust recipe for pie and use the leftover for cookies! Very resourceful 🙂
Hillarys last blog post..A Double Dose of Top Chef (Episodes 3 and 4)
I’ve always loved your posts on parenting, and random family life. Thank you for sharing with us, especially some of your more difficult moments.
The best advice I was given, is after my husband and I got engaged, someone told us to not make any wedding plans or even talk about the wedding for at least a month. Just enjoy being engaged. I loved our engagement month and try to follow this through in other areas too. When we found out we were pregnant, we didn’t tell people right away. Not because we were worried or it’s the thing to do, but we wanted to stop, not make any baby plans, not answer a bunch of questions, etc, but instead to just enjoy it. It’s sometimes hard not to react right away and start ‘doing’. But when you can remember to stop and celebrate the moment, it’s time very well spent.
Extreme parenting produces extreme children ~ and doesn’t that sound scary?! 🙂
I’m actually here to comment on the pie crust cookies, which I love! I think this is a terrific way to use up leftover pie crust. Or make enough crust for a double crust pie even if you only need one, and that way you have extra dough without much extra work. Your cookies are so pretty!
Sandy Ss last blog post..TWD: Linzer Sables
I’ve also got “What to expect when you are expecting”. I couldn’t finish it as my baby came a little bit early. So, I totally agree with you that you need to focus on your instinct on parenting. Especially when you have a new-born that you don’t have time to read at all.
Had to come find out what the book was! 🙂 Hmm. Advice? I think the best thing I ever got wasn’t advice at all. It was simply affirmation from my grandmother who was my best friend and will forever hold that title. I would tell her things about myself, my struggles with becoming me over the years and she would simply say, “Monica, you got it honest.” I was born the way I was and it’s perfectly OK. No need to apologize for being you. And that is what I carry with me as I deal with all people today – my husband and children too. They are who they are. My children are at least 75% born as a certain type of person and 25% conditioned to be a certain way. But they got it honest and it’s my job to not judge them according to my innate personality.
Monica Denniss last blog post..Make New Friends, But Keep The Old
The best parenting advice I received was when I had my first child. As a new mother, I was reading everything I could find, so nothing would be overlooked, that I would make no mistakes. Ha! And someone said to me, relax, there is no wrong. And there is no perfect. There is only a good reason to have a laugh, or give a hug. And nine times out of ten, when I start thinking to myself “wrong”–like driving to school in my bathrobe–I remind myself that there is no wrong, laugh, and go searching for the car keys.
Hello!
I hope you don’t mind my posting a comment. I’m not a mom, but reading your post today really gave me even more of an appreciation for what moms go through every day. Love your blog and can’t wait to try the pie crust cookies. My mom & I were just looking for some new holiday cookie recipes and I think we might have just found one.
🙂
I did something similar with some leftover pie crust with the mincemeat pie. I cut them into strips, brushed them with some melted butter and sprinkled a bit of brown sugar on top. I wanted to use cinnamon but my husband is not a fan 🙁
Mrs. Ls last blog post..American Chop Suey
The best advice I got was that everyone will give you advice and you don’t have to follow any of it. Just listen, nod and do what you feel is right.
I like the sound of this book! It’s almost paralyzing, all the conflicting advice that’s out there. I find that I just have to take a deep breath and do what I believe is best for my child and keep her needs at the forefront. And I also try not to judge others who make different decisions for their kids. I’ve got to think there’s more than one “right” way to parent!
PaniniKathys last blog post..SALE ALERT! Williams-Sonoma Sale on Breville Panini Grill
Mine is still pretty basic but the best advice I got when I was getting married was Never go to bed mad. That has been great because we just work it out and know that it won’t keep going and going.
The best advice I ever got was that it won’t kill the baby to let him cry while you take deep breaths and count to twenty. It’s hard to do, but sanity saving at time.
The best piece of parenting/marriage/life advice I ever received was from other parents and it was not to loose your cool over a small event. You should look at a week instead of one day. For example, look at what your child eats in one week rather than only on Monday. He/she may not be getting the daily recommendations of each food group but they catch up at the end of the week. Same goes for the amount of crafts you do with your child, watching a DVD, how much house work you get done. Some days just don’t amount to a lot but most weeks compare to a marathon!
Just relax! Not everything is the huge, big, pressurized deal that people make it out to be. Be practical and don’t worry about what other people think. Chances are they are worried about what you think too…
katies last blog post..I love Birthdays!
I had just eaten the first pie crust cookie right off the cookie sheet and grabbed my tea and headed into read email. I opened up Dine & Dish and there you were: pie crust cookies.
A wonderful childhood memory — when my mom made pie, she always made cinnamon pie crust cookies for us. Delicious!
Friends of mine with kids have said that being frantic makes your kids frantic, makes life frantic, makes you frantic, so chill. They won’t miss the toys you didn’t buy, they won’t regret not being on three different teams every summer, they won’t hold their lack of special classes against you…unless you continue to talk about it.
And I only recently found your site, but I’m loving it. Thanks so much.
Great Post!! Best piece of advice….hold them as much as you want the first year. It’s more for the mom than for the baby!!
Whitney
Whitneys last blog post..Halloween 2008
Thanks so much for this review. Many of my girlfriends are having their first baby this year and now I’ll have the perfect gift on hand!
Jens last blog post..roasted butternut squash, caramelized onions and prosciutto white pizza
I am so scared to even start reading parenting books because it seems like everyone thinks that their way is THE way. I think I’ll be more like you and follow my instincts and advice of family & friends. But this book does sound like a true winner!
Deborahs last blog post..Baby Shower Cupcakes
Reading parenting books do just make you question how you’re doing things and add to the big bag of guilt that comes with being a parent… That is unless you learn to let go and realise that if you’re even at all worried about how you’re parenting you’re probably doing an okay job. Or at least that’s what I hope or should I feel guilty that I’m not doing a phd in parenting… It’s a minefield… I wish children came with their own individual training manual… then nobody would need parenting books. Go with your own instincts…
Sorry, essay over.
Amandas last blog post..The Cabbage Soup Diet & Chocolate Bread Pudding
I completely agree with you regarding parenting books. I don’t believe there is one magic bullet for every kid. I think it is more about each child as an individual. Even though my second child is only 8 months old, I definitely am parenting him different than I did my first. I trust my gut and my instincts.
Two pieces of advice I truly have taken to heart are 1) never miss an opportunity to say “I love you” and 2) does your face light up when they walk into a room?
Another Amandas last blog post..What Sam Has Been Doing all Weekend
The best advice I got was that I cannot change my husband (an annoying habit or whatever) but I CAN change how I react to it (or not)! Thanks for the chance to win. The book looks really interesting.
a new parent talk blog to spruse up on those parenting skills
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