Best Friends Forever

Let’s talk friendship, shall we?

I don’t have a best friend. I’ve always been one of those girls to have a lot of good friends but as an adult, not a best girl friend. You know, that one friend you can call up and she’ll drop everything and be there in minutes with chocolate ice cream and wine? Or the first friend you call when something happens to a family member, no matter what the time? I crave that friend who understands and will happily participate in an over night slumber party watching Dirty Dancing, Footloose, Say Anything, St Elmo’s Fire and The Breakfast Club? I have no one to call to come indulge my girlhood fantasies of a Gayle / Oprah type friendship.

I love and adore the friends I have. They are some of the best women in the world and I am so lucky to have them for whatever I can get them for. But a best friend is different, right?

I’m thankful my oldest two kids have found “that friend”. Kelly and Kylee have been friends since they were six months old and that friendship has blossomed through the years. Kylee is Kelly’s “I’ve got your back” girl, and Kelly is the same. Kylee lives 6 houses down from us and I bet most outsiders wouldn’t know that Kylee and Kelly don’t belong in the same house. They are rarely seen apart.

Jacob and Daniel are very much the same way. Daniel is our across the street neighbor and was the one I mentioned in my Project 365 post yesterday. They’ve been friends for almost 7 years now and are such a good match. It’s been fascinating to me to see how a boy best friend relationship works. It’s kind of a cool thing… a mutual understanding and respect that I don’t think a lot of girls have with each other. Either way, I am so glad they have each other.

When I was growing up, my mom used to say all the time to me how proud she was because of the friends I chose. I never knew what she meant by that until I had kids. Friends are important, but best friends… who you chose to spend most of your time with… influence you in a way no one else really can. Being associated with the wrong friend can bring you down. Being surrounded by great people can lift you up. I’m thankful my kids have found their bff match because I know from experience how difficult that is to do. A friend is special, but a best friend? A best friend is a rare and wonderful gift.

I’m going to caveat this with… my husband is my best friend and I am so thankful to have him in my life. He’s my lifeline and who I would call first (or nudge) if something happened in the middle of the night. If I was really nice to him, he may even indulge me in a chick flick movie marathon someday. The friendship I’m referring to in this post is a girlfriend bff. Just wanted to make sure I was clear!

Now, tell me about your best friend, will you? How did you meet? How long have you been friends? How have you nurtured your friendship thorough the years? I want to hear all about it!


Disclosure: I am honored to be a 2012 paid brand ambassador for Hallmark Life is a Special Occasion. All opinions expressed are my own. For special discounts, product offerings and news about Hallmark, feel free to sign up for their newsletter.

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  1. says

    Best friends are the most important thing ever (i think :)). I come from a really BIG family, I have 4 sisters and one brother, and I am the middle child! Its hard to form a strong friendship with anyone after the amazing bond I have with my sisters, they would do anything for me as I would do for them, my phone needs to charge several times a day to keep up with our chats :) Apart from them, I have a best friend I have never actually met in person! I met her on Instagram last year and we have spoken every night ever since! She is just like me in so many ways, and has been my emotional support so often and has allowed me to be there for her as well. She is one of my sisters now too!

    • says

      I love that your siblings and you are so close. That is awesome!
      I also ADORE that you found a BFF via Instagram. That is so cool!! What a neat thing the online world has done for friendships!

  2. says

    I think most kids seem to have best friends and then through the years things pull them apart – school, boys/girls, distance, work, etc. I had a best friend or two back in the day… many many moons ago, but no longer. We’re still friends now but it’s different.

  3. says

    I am with you on the husband being my best friend, however, I do have a girl BFF – Lisa. She’s my second cousin, we went to the same high school (although she was a year older than me) and ended up being roommates in college for a year (I think that’s where we really became bestest friends). For a few years we lived hours (if not a day driving) apart, and it was great because whenever we saw each other it didn’t matter how long it had been since we’d talked, our friendship was never awkward. We now live only a half an hour apart and it is great to be able to see each other often! I know that a best friend is hard to find, and am glad that I have a friend like Lisa.

    What makes it even more fun is that she has a son my son’s age and she’s about to have another baby boy in December, so pretty close to my new baby’s age. It is great to have friends for my children whenever we see each other! (She also has a daughter older than my son, but she’s really good at playing with her brother and my son.)

  4. says

    Best friends are grand indeed. I’ve been friends with someone I had never met for TWELVE years. He lives in Australia and we met online. We instantly became friends, through the internet and then pen pals. He finally was in NY this summer and flew down to MV to meet! Best time ever! I can call him up with anything and I know he’s there to support me. My other two best friends came while at culinary school. They’re my girls that I can just sit and chat and pluck our eyebrows together while eating ice cream and watching extreme couponing. #lovethemall

  5. says

    I love your Hallmark posts. I have a best friend, but she lives far away. Not the same. My husband is my best friend too, but it’s just not the same–doesn’t cover the chick-flick, brutal honesty while shopping, and ice cream binge territory.

  6. Jenny says

    Hi! I used yo have a best friend but he passed away but he was awesome because he was the kind of friend that would wake up in the middle of the night to pick me up no matter where I was. He really accepted me with all my difficult traits and defects. We met in college taking a summer class and even though we didn’t have the same major we tried to keep in touch as muh as we could! He was and is my best friend of all time!!! I miss him and will always love my best friend!!!

  7. Jackie Davis says

    I love this post too. I have a BFF. We met my freshment year at Baylor University, Waco, TX. She lived in Longview, TX. I lived in St. Joe, MO. Little did we know, but her cousin was one of my best friends growing up. Small world! We have been through college, jobs, marriages, babies, illness, and death of parents. We talk every morning during the week at 6:15am on our way to work. It is our way to start the day! She is my favorite person to travel with (besides my husband and family). We make the effort to see each other a couple of times of year (she lives in Texas, me in KC). Pam has truly blessed my life!

    • MedSchool says

      *raises paw * Oooooooooooo…SIC EM BEARS! This made my night, although you’re prob a lot older than I am. :) I didn’t get to have a bff while there though.

  8. says

    Well, my best friend is Natalia. We met in kindergarden, but started our friendship at 4th grade. Since then, 1995, we’ve been best friends. Even though I went to live to Philadelphia for 2 years on 2008, and she is now at Canada, we are still best friends and tell each other everything, from the worst of trouble to the funniest things that happen to us every day. It’s awesome to have someone you can count on, every day of your life. And we’ve been for so much together, that we have a special link, kind of sisters (even when I have two sisters), and adventures companions LOL. =) Loved your post, thanks for sharing!

  9. says

    My best friend is also my big sister… And believe me, I know how blessed that makes me! We have always been close, she practically raised me as our mum was seriously ill when were growing up, but now that we’re older we have become equals… And on occasion she lets the roles reverse! We now live in separate cities, but have lunchtime ‘phone dates’ every week, text randomly and constantly, have frequent girls weekends together and once a year go on holiday together (sometime letting our husbands tag along)! Our husbands they are like two peas in a pod and love all the time the 4 of us spend together… Which is just as well, because they don’t get much choice about it! When I was ten I gave my sister a little pocket card that said “my sister, my best friend” and had a silly little verse on it… What I didn’t know was that she kept this in her purse for the next 15 years until I got married and she gave it back to me on my hen day (which she threw for me, as chief bridesmaid, obviously!). I think that says it all :) I wish everyone could be as blessed as I am to have her!

  10. says

    Oh, how I love this post! Aaaaand, you know what? My husband is also my best friend and, well, I really needed to read this post right now. Thanks, Kristen :)

  11. says

    Just recently I became a part of a group of girls that I consider my BFFs. It’s so different for me since I haven’t had this type of relationship since elementary school. But of course, my husband is my best friend, too, but I’m so thankful to have some girls I can call (well, text) anytime and they really hear me.

  12. says

    I met my BFF in high school, in fencing class. We still joke about that. We’ve been inseparable for about 30 years, despite all the boyfriends that tried to break us up! We still live only a few blocks apart and see each other on a regular basis. In fact, she’s dropping off some lasagna for me today (because we cook for each other too!)

  13. says

    I have several BFFs, one i’ve been friends with since 4th grade, the other is someone from high school when I moved across the country. I am still very close with these girls, and several others from law school. I have different friends who would come running or who would be my first call depending on the situation; but one friend in particular, someone I met as an adult, is someone who I could call day or night and she’d drop everything for me.

    Maybe it’s by virtue of both of us being single that we have this kind of relationship since my emotional energy is not taken up by a significant other. My friendships do change when someone gets in a serious relationship and I believe that as we get older it gets harder to maintain more than one intimate relationship.

  14. says

    When I was in 4th grade, a classmate, Courtney, called me up and asked if I would go to the mall with her. I remember putting the phone down & asking my mom if I could go. My mom said yes, but I said I didn’t know if I wanted to go. I said I don’t know her very well & I didn’t know what we’d talk about. My mom told me to go and maybe, just maybe, we’d become good friends. I’m 38 years old now and Court has been my best friend ever since 4th grade. We’ve moved around the country (she moved to Milwaukee for college, then Arizona, then Chicago, and I moved to NYC then San Diego) but that hasn’t stopped us from being there for each other. I can’t imagine if I would have said no to that mall trip!

  15. says

    I had that one, wonderful best friend in high school and unfortunately our lives drifted apart during college. These days, I do have a nice, supportive group of fellow mom friends, but along with getting older and having busier lives and many responsibilities – plus social media – it seems like the landscape of “best friends” has changed probably for many women.

  16. Wendy @ AMFT says

    I don’t have a best girlfriend either. I have some really close girlfriends and I love them dearly. I’ve always wanted one of those types of friends.

  17. says

    I’m 60 and my best friend ‘pushed herself’ on me when I was in grade 3. I was new to the school and handing out a handful (that’s all we could afford to invite) of invitations to my birthday party. Brenda came right up and asked why she wasn’t invited. I had no answer but we had never even talked at that point. She invited herself and came. We’ve been friends ever since. She’s the only constant in my life. We live thousands of miles apart but we still make sure we keep in touch.

  18. says

    Like you, I have lots of girlfriends. Many of whom I could call in the middle of the night, or call if I have exciting news, but I don’t consider any of them my BEST friend. My husband is my best friend, but I don’t have one girlfriend who falls into that category. It kind of bums me out, as I did have best friends while I was growing up. Do you think we’re just too busy with work and family? I try to nurture my friendships, hoping one will develop into the type that could be consider a bestie, but so far no luck. Most of my girlfriends are super busy with their lives, too.

  19. says

    wow as I read this and the comments, I realize how much I feel the same way. I have girlfriends that I sometimes am with but I dont have that someone they portray in movies as the person you call and what not. When Ashlyn died the person I would say is my BF (since 7th grade) did step up better than anyone else and get my through but when something similar happened to her she shut down. It was heart breaking because I wanted that movie like bond with someone and to be honest I still do, but I think maybe as we grow up its a bit harder to have when we have a family.

  20. Mia says

    I just found your blog! The recipes look great, and this was a great post for my first visit :)

    I don’t really have a best friend. But I’m jealous of people who do, and I sort of claim to have one (or two) anyway. My closest friend and I have been friends since 9th grade biology. We went to college together and were roommates the last two years. We moved to LA the same day to teach in inner city public schools. We moved to the midwest at the same time (but sadly not the same city) to go back to school. In some ways we’re really different, but we have a lot of important stuff in common. Long phone calls and the occasional visit are our crucial friendship nurturers. Thanks for letting me brag about her :)


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