Ahh Dammit (and a Funnel Cake Recipe)

Ella, my 2 1/2 year old and I were in Target the other day, enjoying a rare morning where just the two of us get to hang out. We were leisurely shopping when Ella all of a sudden burst out in a very loud voice, “Ahhhh Dammit!” Shocked, I looked down to find her just sitting in the cart with a smirk on her face, and out it comes again… “Ahh Dammit!” Mortified, I try to hush her, but the more I tried the louder she gets. “Ahhh Dammit!” Just then, a mom with her brand new baby (like barely weeks old) walks by, obviously basking in the fact that her little one was snuggled up on her chest, quietly sleeping. Ella looks at the lady and out it comes again… “Ahhh Dammit!” The new mom, apparently not used to 2 1/2 year olds got a shocked look on her face, eyes large and looked at me like “Are you seriously sitting there allowing your 2 1/2 year old to cuss?” I smiled and then quickly put my hand over Ella’s mouth, which just resulted in her screaming.

Motherhood is funny sometimes. You don’t totally realize what you are getting yourself into when the babes are just tiny little creatures…demanding, yet still so vunerable. You watch movies, like Stepmom, and imagine that when your kids are older you will have lots of moments where the whole family is singing and dancing in front of the bedroom mirror using curling irons and brushes as your microphones. You dream of long talks over dinner, with your kids spilling their hearts out to you about everything that is happening in their lives. Oh, and that dinner? Every night it is well balanced and loved by all.  And as your babe lies in your arms, you cannot imagine words like “Ahhhh Dammit” coming out of their mouths, especially in public!

<<Enter screeching record player sound of reality>>

The truth about motherhood is that, yes… we have fun with our kids, but those “movie scene” moments don’t happen as often as we’d like. Dinnertime soul to soul conversations? Haven’t happened for us yet, but with the help of some Food for Talk conversation starters, we are getting there. And that well balanced dinner? It can happen, but sometimes in the form of what we had for dinner the other night… cheese, carrots with ranch, cereal and a slice of turkey lunchmeat. Not what you imagine a food blogger serving up at night, is it? Well, and how about that lovely language coming out of the mouth of my 2 1/2 year old? All I have to do for that one is look in the mirror. Yes… “Dammit” happens to be my cuss word of choice and apparently I’ve been letting it escape from my own mouth far too often lately. Remember this, moms… don’t say anything you don’t want repeated by the little walking voice recorders in your house.

Oh…and one more thing. Learn Karma the easy way. If you plan on raising kids, never, ever lift your eyebrows at something you see a toddler do in a grocery store. Chances are it will come back to haunt you!

So, right now when I tell you that the girls and I enjoyed funnel cakes this morning for breakfast, I expect you to just nod, move on and not judge.

County Fair Funnel Cakes (adapted from Recipezaar)

  1. Beat eggs, sugar and vanilla together and then add the milk slowly–beat. Add the dry ingredients and beat until smooth and creamy.
  2. Pour batter into a funnel and at the same time, use your finger to plug the hole. In a large cast iron pot, add 2 inches of oil to the bottom.
  3. When the oil becomes hot, move your hand over the pot and slowly release your finger so the batter can start cooking.
  4. Move the funnel around to make designs.
  5. Brown on both sides–then immediately remove and drain extremely well.
  6. Top with brown sugar, or honey, or cinnamon sugar, or powdered sugar as a topping.

(Quick tip I learned from a Recipezaar member. If you don’t have a funnel, empty out a squeezable ketchup bottle and wash it thoroughly. Pour your batter into the bottle and squeeze the batter out, using that instead of a funnel. I prefer to do it this way because I can then easily store any leftover batter in the fridge for next go arouund!)

You have until tomorrow night to share your favorite family recipe with my family… you could win an Amazon.com gift certificate for doing so! Head over to this post to find out more.

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Comments

  1. says

    If someone had actually asked me if I was allowing my two year old to cuss I probably would have had some much ruder cuss words prepared for her. I mean how do you stop a two year old from cussing except to ignore it and let it run its course.

    katies last blog post..Bread

  2. says

    My daughter was saying Dammit too but with a British accent and we just could not figure it out. We don’t know anyone with a British accent nor do any of us say dammit (other words yes, but never dammit). So one day we were watching Hornblower-our favorite British navel hero- only to hear him say “Dahmmit men row for your lives!” Ah ha!

    We love funnel cakes and all the comments on this post are a hoot!

    Robin Sues last blog post..Potluck Pet Peeves

  3. says

    That’s so funny. I’m 100% certain every mom has a similar story though at the time it feels like holy cow has this happened to anyone else?!

    I absolutely hate when you are “talking” with your child in public & you get those folks who stare at you judgingly not minding there own business. I admit to responding with a glare & a “yes, did you need something?”

    I see nothing wrong in either of your meal choices! Funnel cake sounds great to me! Thanks for the recipe & tip!
    ~ingrid

    ingrids last blog post..Meyer lemons & what to make?

  4. says

    That is hilarious! My thing was singing beer commercials in church. My sister danced around the store singing that her mommy has “hippos” to feed her baby brother. I know we embarrassed our mom plenty!

    Dianas last blog post..Sweet Avocado "Tacos"

  5. says

    I would have passed out if my Mom had ever made funnel cakes for breakfast. In my book, that makes you pretty amazing!

    We all have those moments, intentional or no. When I was growing up, my younger brother had a problem with the letter T. It always came out as the letter F for some reason. One day, we were walking down the road and a whole line of trucks came driving by. He got very excited and shouted “Truck! Truck! Truck!” as they passed. … it didn’t come out that way, though. The rest of us (including my mother) started off horrified, but when we realized what was going on, we laughed ’til we cried.

    Great story!

    Midwest Moms last blog post..Easy Valentine Fun: Tissue Paper Flowers

  6. says

    Ah, yes. The cussing toddlers. No judgment here! My own mother loves to repeat the tale that when I was a toddler, and had a fresh haircut which I didn’t like, a man in the market walked up to me and said “Some little boy just got a haircut.” As a 4 year old girl, this apparently offended me, because I replied “You mind your own god damned business.”

    Kates last blog post..Blog Alert: This is why you’re fat

  7. says

    OMG this was hilarious!!! LOLLLL I have an 18 month old and he LOVE sticks only he can’t say it right. He says it with a d instead of a s. So yeah…he finds the perfect time in crowded areas to yell it out.

    Yesdivascancooks last blog post..Bourbon Chicken

  8. says

    Great recipe, thanks for sharing.
    p.s. next time, instead of putting your hand over your daughter’s mouth, trying actually TELLING your daughter, “NO, you are not allowed to use those words.” If she says it again, immediately take her out of the cart and out of the store. Yes, it’s that easy. It worked for me. Only had to do it once.

    • says

      Hi Elaine –
      I’m so glad you loved them! I honestly have never had enough batter leftover for them to last, but I believe it’s a lot like pancake batter, which can stay a couple of days in the fridge. I’m not positive but I think that should be ok!
      Thanks!
      Kristen

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