From the Archives – Return of Alpha Mom vs Slacker Mom

OK all – I am taking the advice of some of you who gave me suggestions about my missing mojo. I have decided to revisit some of my favorite posts from the past that you may have missed. A new post will be up this weekend, but for now, I hope you enjoy the return of Alpha Mom vs Slacker Mom!

Barbeque Chicken Calzones

Barbeque Chicken Calzones

Alpha Moma modern mom who is confident and in control, a well informed decision-making multitasker. Hip, educated, technologically savvy, type A–personality mom.

I know that this is completely against all things good about the feminist movement, but I have always wanted to be like June Cleaver, or our modern day example, (minus all of the random murders, drug issues, etc) Bree Van de Camp. I would love to be the mom that always has linens on the table adorned with a beautiful centerpiece of fresh cut flowers from my garden in the middle. Having a plate of fresh from the oven cookies available whenever the little ones come in from playing in the picket fenced yard would be ideal. Having my home be in tip top shape, laundry never piling up, and my kitchen sink always shiny would be standard behavior for me. I would be the Alpha Mom… complete with the hip clothes, ever full PDA and a shining disposition.

I read an article in a small local magazine this week about the Alpha Mom and her opposite… the Slacker Mom. As much as I try to be like the Aplha Mom, I have discovered that my tendencies tend to be more Slacker Mom oriented. An example of this would be last nights dinner.

Alpha Mom – Alpha Mom would have looked at her menu for the week early on in the day, making notes of what meat needs to be thawed and what advanced preparations need to be made for dinner to be a complete success.

Slacker Mom – Slacker Mom remembers at 4:30pm that Calzones is on the menu. She completely forgot to start the bread dough and at this point, it is too late for it to rise and be ready by the 5:30pm dinner time. She looks in her fridge and realizes that there is no meat thawed, so she quickly takes some chicken out of the freezer, sticks it in the microwave and uses the handy defrost feature.

Alpha Mom – Alpha Mom would pull out her binder of organized recipes, or better yet…she would look on her PDA recipe program and pull up the perfect, tried and true Calzone recipe. After remembering that her recipe requires fresh Basil, Alpha Mom would put on her matching gardening gloves and head out to her bountiful herb garden in the backyard. She would clip some fresh Basil from her flourishing Basil plant and happily take it inside, ready to be added to the recipe.

Slacker Mom – Slacker Mom is in a rush and barely has time to look through recipes. She pulls up Recipezaar and pours through the Calzone recipes, hoping to find one that does not require a yeast based crust or store bought pizza crust. Once she finds a recipe that will work she notices it uses Basil. She looks at her barely thriving Basil plant and realizes that she does not have enough basil. She remembers that her neighbor is on vacation and that her Basil plant is like Alpha Mom’s…huge, bushy and flourishing. She crosses the street and sneaks into her fenced yard…snipping several Basil leaves off the plant and then returns home, pleased at her sleuthing abilities.

Alpha Mom – Alpha Mom doubles the recipe for her Calzones so that she can freeze some for her family. This way, her family can enjoy hot, fresh from the oven Calzones any time they wish.

Slacker Mom – Slacker Mom cannot think past 2 hours from now, let alone think about what her family can have for lunch a month down the road.

Alpha Mom – Alpha Mom has the kitchen back in order, her makeup and hair freshened up, and a smile on her face…ready to greet her loving husband at the door when he returns home. Dinner, complete with salad and fresh vegetables, will be hot and on the table by the time he comes downstairs after changing out of his work clothes.

Slacker Mom – Slacker Mom barely looks up when her husband comes home from his week long business trip. She and the kitchen are covered in flour and dough and dishes are everywhere. The kids are causing a commotion in the background, probably cutting each others hair or something, and the Calzones have yet to be baked.

Alpha Mom – Alpha Mom and her family enjoy a nice dinner outside on their patio…sipping lemonade, having intellectual conversation, and listening to brilliant little Timmy spouting off Fibonacci number sequences.

Slacker Mom – Dinner is served, outside on the deck. Calzones is it…no veggies, no salad…no intellectual conversation. In fact listening to the kids argue about who acted best while daddy was gone is the complete extent of the conversation.

I think you get the idea. I am definitely not the Alpha Mom. I am also not a complete slacker like I make myself out to be. I at least had a menu for the week. I did not give up and run out to McDonald’s for dinner. I was resourceful enough to know which neighbor to steal Basil from. I tried a new recipe, and it is one that will now be my standard Calzone recipe. If I was the Alpha Mom all the time, I wouldn’t have needed a recipe without the yeast based dough. Because I am not the Alpha Mom I discovered a Calzone recipe that has the most tender and delicious outer crust. The filling was a nice change from the typical Calzone and the reason why no intellectual conversation was heard at dinner time was because everyone was too busy stuffing their faces full of these delicious Calzone’s.

If you, like me, aren’t the Bree Van de Camp of your block and need a recipe that does not require a lot of advance preparation, go with this slacker…these Barbecue Chicken Calzones will be a hit with your brilliant family.

Barbeque Chicken Calzones (Adapted from Recipezaar)


2 ½ – 3 cups flour

4 teaspoons baking powder

3 teaspoons fresh basil

1 tablespoon sugar

1/2 cup butter , melted

2/3 cup warm water

6 teaspoons instant powdered milk 2 eggs


2 teaspoons margarine or butter

1 onion , diced

2 boneless skinless chicken breasts , cooked and diced

1 cup grated cheddar cheese

1 1/4 cups barbecue sauce

  1. Combine 2 ½ cups flour, baking powder, sugar and basil.
  2. Add milk powder to water and stir until disolved, add to dry mixture.
  3. Add eggs and melted butter and mix well. Add more flour until dough is easy to work with. Not dry, but not super sticky.
  4. Set aside while making the filling.
  5. For the filling: Cook onions in butter over medium heat until onions are tender.
  6. Add chicken and cook through.
  7. Remove from heat and stir in barbeque sauce and cheese.
  8. Divide dough into 8 pieces and roll out into 6 inch circles.
  9. Place ½ cup of filling in each circle.
  10. Fold dough in half and seal edges tightly.
  11. Bake at 350 degrees for 15-20 minutes or until top begins to brown slightly.
  12. Serve warm with extra barbeque sauce to dip in if desired.

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  1. says

    Cute comparison/contrast here. I can have a little bit of each of these moms in me on any given day. (I like to keep ’em guessing!)

    I’ve never made calzones before. Perhaps it’s time to give them a try? They look so tempting in your photos…

  2. says

    I’m a slacker mom, too! I wish I could be an alpha mom, but it’s just not in me! Those calzones look like something my family would enjoy.

  3. says

    There’s nothing anti-feminist about wanting to have a perfect house and perfect food. Perfectionist, sure, but the only way that becomes sketchy is if you’re saying that having a perfect home, etc., is ALL a woman is good for and it’s the highest thing she ought to aspire to, or that only women can aspire to these things, and men can’t or shouldn’t.

    So don’t beat yourself up on those grounds. Or, for that matter, on the grounds of Slacker vs. Alpha – you made your own dough from scratch, lady! How is that slacking?

  4. Nella says

    Thanks for using a “leftover post”. I hadn’t read it and it was great. I have the tendencies of the Slacker Girl. I am sitting here at 5:26pm and no dinner started, I have no kids at home, I really have no excuse, for I am a Slacker Girl!!!!!! Thanks for the laugh. Nella

  5. says

    Great post! I think we all need to be reminded occasionally that even if we don’t see ourselves as perfect things will turn out well in the end. Psst: besides, no one really is Alpha Mom, even if it looks like that from our point of view.
    Thank you for re-sharing!

    Michas last blog post..A Piz-za Pie!

  6. says

    Cute post! I am no Alpha Mom but I do have my days.
    Unfortunately today wasn’t one of them. We had dinner from Taco Bell! :-)

    I’m glad to hear you are taking care of yourself. I’m enjoying the chance to look over your archives!

    Lisas last blog post..Halloween Vampire Bat Cake


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